Tuesday, April 05, 2005

Adrienne Curry is Not the Only Reality TV Whore Up in This Bitch

What the hell happened to The Bachelor? I have only watched intermittently being more of a Bachelorette fan personally, and I admit that my interest is waning, but this show is now a joke. These sluts are fighting over this guy? He is the least sincere, most goofy unemployed ass clown – obviously riding the coat tails of his marginally less goofy brother who just happened to fall ass-backwards into a movie career and a relationship with Uncle Jesse’s ex. (Strike what I said about “marginally less goofy.” I forgot that I saw Kangaroo Jack.) And what is with the rose ceremonies? At first I thought that Charlie was just too cool to wear a suit or at the very least a collared shirt, now I see that everyone is wearing jeans. It’s disrespectful to everything The Bachelor used to stand for. The best part of the show last night was after the rose ceremony when they interviewed the embittered castoffs, and one said “Krissily is white trash. And I’m not. And he’ll find that out later on.” Me-ow. These cat fights are the only thing that keeps me watching.

My coworker just showed me a clip of Triumph the Dog at a Star Wars convention. My stomach still hurts from laughing. Where have I been that I haven’t even heard about him? I used to love Conan O’Brien and was a faithful watcher until it became very necessary to get a real job and to get up at a decent hour for said real job.

Last night I cooked Chinese lemon chicken for dinner. My husband has the palate of a picky 4 year old; therefore I make the same basic dishes over and over, make sure that the foods don’t touch on the plate, cut the crusts off, and keep plenty of ketchup in reserve. He actually said “Mmmm!” Oh my God, I don’t even get an “Mmmm” for steak. I said “really?” and in his best Joey Tribianni impression he said “chicken – good, rice – good, lemonade (or sauce, whatever) – good.” Huh.

I am selling my first batch of crap on Ebay, and I have found a healthy, all natural replacement for the drugs I used to take in college. I get high each time I see that people are fighting over my garbage that I was just going to sell at a yard sale for a quarter anyway. Not really, some of the things are new gifts (shhh) that are actually useful or desirable to someone else. That is why I will never reveal my Ebay username; because I might be selling the offensive perfume you thought I’d love.

Labels: , ,


Post a Comment

<< Home