Wednesday, November 15, 2006

B-A-N-A-N-A-S

One of the newest things to drive me crazy is the misuse of clichés or commonly used phrases. I’m sure I’m guilty of this too, but it doesn’t bother me when I do it. Imagine that.

On Top Chef last week someone screwed up approximately 3 clichés in one sentence. I don’t remember all of them, but one was “don’t throw me off the bus.” Correct cliché (all of these are in my experience only) = “Don’t throw me under the bus.”

On The Amazing Race one of the guys said his partner was being “snickety.” Is that acting in the manner of Lemony Snicket? Correct cliché = “Being snippy” or “In a snit.”

Once an old boyfriend told me that someone was “tempting the waters of fate.” I just looked at him slack-jawed and wondered how I could’ve ever made out with such a dumb ass. Correct cliché = “Tempt the hand of fate” and/or “Test the waters.”

I have a coworker who I actually like a whole lot, but who constantly tempts the waters of fate with her misuse of names/words/and clichés. We were recently talking about someone who was once looked upon favorably, but who is now in the doghouse with our supervisor. She told me that “the dew was off the lily” and “the glow was off the rose” in so many variations that I eventually forgot just what the fuck we were talking about in the first place. I’m not even sure of the correct cliché in this instance. The bloom is off the rose? She also tells me several times a week that different things are not her bailiwick. Okay, I understand that that’s a way of saying that something’s not your job, but you made me look up the word in the dictionary, and you’re still not pronouncing it right.

Updated to add: don't even get me started on "innocent bystandard."

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6 Comments:

Blogger MysteryGirl said...

Hysterical.

12:35 PM  
Blogger C. said...

Ever since the enceph. I swear to God I'm Balki.

At least when I do it, I always say, "or however the hell you say it."

7:22 PM  
Blogger Allygator said...

My favorite is "for all intensive purposes"

People kill me!

8:24 PM  
Blogger mk99 said...

"I have no ideal" or "vica versa".

I'm with you sister.

10:54 PM  
Blogger Barbara said...

Oh what fun!! I love it!!

5:59 PM  
Blogger TL said...

Sometimes I mix them up - and come out with the craziest shit.

Example - two weeks ago at work (if you will). I tried to say, "I'll touchbase with you later" OR "I'll catch up with you later"

What came out was -

"I'll touch you up later"

(Go directly to Human Resources. Do not collect $200!)

11:53 PM  

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