Monday, April 16, 2007

Further Evidence That I'm Aging

The first clue was that I could't make it through a screening of Borat last weekend.

I recently heard this song and was impressed that she was using some of her vocal "talent". Then I listened to the lyrics. This is just plain offensive:

U + Ur Hand by Pink

Uh uh uh uh uh uh uh oh
Uh uh uh uh uh uh uh oh
Check it out
Going out
On the late night
Looking tight
Feeling nice
It's a cock fight
I can tell
I just know
That it's going down
Tonight
At the door we don't wait cause we know them
At the bar six shots just beginning
That's when dickhead put his hands on me
But you see

I'm not here for your entertainment
You don't really want to mess with me tonight
Just stop and take a second
I was fine before you walked into my life
Cause you know it's over
Before it begins
Keep your drink just give me the money
just you and your hand tonight

Uh uh uh uh uh uh uh oh
Uh uh uh uh uh uh uh oh

Midnight
I'm drunk
I don't give a fuck
Wanna dance
By myself
Guess you're outta luck
Don't touch
Back up
I'm not the one
Uh,uh, buh bye
Listen up it's just not happening
You can say what you want to your boyfriends
Just let me have my fun tonight
A'ight

I'm not here for your entertainment
You don't really want to mess with me tonight
Just stop and take a second
I was fine before you walked into my life
Cause you know it's over
Before it begins
Keep your drink just give me the money
just you and your hand tonight

Uh uh uh uh uh uh uh oh
Break break break
Break it down

In the corner with your boys you bet up five bucks
To get at the girl that just walked in but she thinks you suck
We didn't get all dressed up just for you to see
So quit spilling your drinks on me yeah

You know who you are
High fivin, talkin shit, but you're going home alone arentcha?

Cause I'm not here for your entertainment
You don't really want to mess with me tonight
Just stop and take a second
I was fine before you walked into my life
Cause you know it's over
Before it begins
Keep your drink just give me the money
just you and your hand tonight

I'm not here for your entertainment
You don't really want to mess with me tonight
Just stop and take a second
I was fine before you walked into my life
Cause you know it's over
Before it begins
Keep your drink just give me the money
just you and your hand tonight

I'm not here for your entertainment
You don't really want to mess with me tonight
Just stop and take a second
I was fine before you walked into my life
Cause you know it's over
Before it begins
Keep your drink just give me the money
just you and your hand tonight

Labels:

13 Comments:

Blogger MysteryGirl said...

Oh no. How does this happen so quickly?! Good thing you are not alone. I'm certain that just 2 years ago, this song would have been fine. Thanks for pointing out the crudeness. I had no idea. I hear this song every 5 minutes on Sirius but have never really listened to it. I never considered the title at all. WTF?

1:10 PM  
Blogger Allygator said...

Really...you didn't like Borat?!? Man, it's the only movie I've seen in years where we even watched the deleted scenes.

It's not like you are THAT much older than me! ;)

3:50 PM  
Blogger MysteryGirl said...

I hated Borat too. Didn't laugh once. Apparently we are aging faster than others...not mentioning any names.

7:57 PM  
Blogger Allygator said...

Well, not to rub it in but you all ARE older than me! :P

10:45 PM  
Blogger Allygator said...

When are you going to update, yo? I need my Cory fix!

10:43 AM  
Blogger MysteryGirl said...

I'm aging so fast just waiting for you to update this damn thing.

5:45 PM  
Blogger Allygator said...

You do realize you haven't posted in almost 2 months, right?!?

That makes me sad. :(

1:47 PM  
Anonymous kay said...

Well, then. I staggered over here via "nejyerf," and I'm ever-so-glad I did.

Please don't be creeped out or frightened by this, but I have just spent the last several hours reading every.last.one. of your entries, because I love the way you write. You make me laugh. And I'm relatively harmless.

And now that I've found you, I see that you haven't updated in a few months, and that makes me sad, even though I understand that life sometimes gets in the way of our free time, and our blogging.

But I have to tell you a few things:

* Your dad and my #4 Son share the same birthday. Probably not the same year, though, as #4 is 13.

* I HAVE a typewriter key bracelet! But I assure you quite heartily that I did NOT pay $140 for mine. (But it was more expensive than any other bracelet in my possession.)

* As for decimated cliches and phrases, my ex-husband's new wife often says, "Well, beggars can't be choosy!" or "That's when the last straw hit the fan!" or some other such inanity. She's nice, but quite dumb.

* And I'm sorry, but I always think that those Bluetooth-wearing folks are semi-pretentious. Clearly, I have yet to experience the glory that is Bluetooth. I'll work on it.

* And plantars warts! (See? I really did go all the way back...) Aforementioned #4 Son just dug the rest of the wart-guts from the bottom of his big toe after using mama-recommended acid patches for a few weeks. Had we known about duct tape, I can assure you the whine-factor here would have dipped consderably. He did a ridiculous amount of complaining about the fact that "my 'loving' mother would put acid on me! ACID! You're crazy!"

That's all for now. Reasonable, really, for TWO YEARS' worth of entries.

I show remarkable restraint, don't you think?

C'mon! Update!

10:37 PM  
Blogger Cory said...

Kay -

I'm flattered! You are very kind. Do you have a blog? I'll come see you if you do.

5:45 PM  
Blogger MysteryGirl said...

Cory...you just can not leave us all hanging with a PINK post. Please come back. We forgive you.

5:42 PM  
Blogger T said...

WOMAN!!! Where are you? Pot calling the kettle black and all that but you need to get yo' butt back posting!!!

Miss you tons and tons. Will be heading out to sunny FL sometime over the next month or 2 so you better catch up by then!!

10:13 PM  
Blogger Fightin' Mad Mary said...

"Further Evidence That I'm Aging"

You should add the third clue "I forgot that I have a blog."

3:08 AM  
Blogger mk99 said...

To say we miss you is a understatement. I think we might have to stage a "sit in" demanding your return.

7:45 AM  

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