I am Freaking Out Somewhat

I awoke this morning to read that 30,000 are expected dead from that earthquake and that 1.9 million Americans are supposed to die from the bird flu. I have this flaw in my personality that allows me to believe everything I see/read/hear is true. I also found this morning's updates at Post Secret to be especially depressing.

In superficial news--which I prefer--I loved that Napoleon Dynamite hosted Saturday Night Live last night. He is so cute despite the fact that he has the hair cut of an elementary school kid in the 1970's. I've seen that in more than one place. When did this become fashionable? The new cast members are great, I just wish Tina Fey would come back from maternity leave because I can tell the difference in the writing. It is definitely lacking and about as funny as learning that you will probably die from the bird flu within the next year. Is it evil that I secretly wished Ashlee Simpson would mess up her performance AGAIN? I may need to get a life.

Earlier this week, I called my friend Tina while she was ordering lunch in the Burger King drive thru with her 19-year-old daughter in the car. The following exchange took place in about 10 seconds while she was simultaneously talking to me on the phone:

Daughter: I'll have a hamburger with ketchup and no pickles.
Tina: Give her a number 4 with blah blah blah.
Daughter: With extra mayonnaise
Tina: Girl, you don't need any extra mayonnaise. (to the speaker) Don't put any mayonnaise on that.
Daughter: Don't tell me what I can eat (to the speaker) Put mayonnaise on it!
Tina: I'll tell you what you can eat!
Tina: (to the speaker) Don't put any mayonnaise on that. And that will be all ma'am, Thank you.
Drive Thru Lady: I can't even hear you.
Me: Laughter
Tina: What's so funny?