Wednesday, July 19, 2006

Other People, They Make Me Laugh

My friend Beverly talking about someone who angered her:

She's a hater. She's just a big old glass of Hatorade.

My two-year-old nephew, when asked if he wanted to be put in time out:


My sister from her desk at work:

Someone in my scent radius is wearing baby lotion. Baby lotion! On an adult! Someone else is clipping their nails. I have to cover up my coffee cup in case one comes flying over my cubicle wall.


Yeah. I think I'm going to stop trying to bake gluten-free bread.



Blogger Barbara said...

That thing is just plain scary looking!

When I threatened our 2 year old daughter with being put to bed this afternoon, she turned around and walked away. "Where are you going?" I asked. "To bed!" she replied. sigh...

8:45 PM  
Blogger MysteryGirl said...

I'm scared of the way it came up from the pan like that. You keep making it, so it must be good. You also keep calling it bread. It looks more like a fucked up cake or an enlarged pound cake. Is it really like your standard loaf of bread, just bigger?

12:17 AM  
Anonymous Heather said...

Dude. Point A) I can totally hear Bridget's voice right now, and I'm equally amused. Point B) That bread looks AWESOME and exactly the opposite of what I get with all my healthy whole wheat efforts, which never seem to rise properly. Have you been to the Flying Biscuit in Atlanta? You should totally start your own gluten-free restaurant. You can call it the 'Flying Loaf.'

8:46 AM  
Blogger C. said...

I totally heard that whole story in your sisters own voice! She might not think we're funny, but I think she is damn funny! : )

Hatorade? Please help me remember to use that as much as possible.

12:14 PM  
Blogger C. said...

Um, I promise Heather's comment wasn't posted when I did mine. Apparently we both hear voices! : )

12:43 PM  
Blogger Allygator said...

You need to get an audio clip of Beverly saying that...I'm overdue for a good ole water-coming-out-my-nose laugh!

1:49 PM  
Anonymous Bridget said...

Seriously though, in my opinion baby scented anything only smells good on little babies! Do you know that the car wash guy offered to put baby powered air freshener in my car. Can you think of anything that would cause a migrane faster?

C. - I think you and Cory are hilarious! If I ever told you guys 'You guys are only ones that think you are funny' was because I was a pain in the ass adolescent and I apologize. You guys are great!

Are you going all anonymous because of the psycho lady who was picking on MK99? Probably a good idea because she's nuts.

Cory - What's up with that 'bread' (I'm using air quotes)?

Barbara - So what do you do when a 2 year old calls your bluff? How have they figured us out so quickly??

2:42 PM  
Blogger MysteryGirl said...

Hey Bridget, with a comment that long you could have your own blog.

12:24 AM  
Blogger C. said...

B - I second Kasey! Blog, blog, blog!

I had to go all snnnnneaky-like because I started openly ranting on the MIL! Oh, and there were a couple of (diving related) rants about G.!

You know my luck with crap like this.

Ummm, nothing like baby powder on an adult and flying nail shards in your coffee. You crack me up!

10:34 AM  
Blogger Allygator said...

Yeah, Bridge, stop hi-jacking Cory's blog and get your own!!! ;)

BTW, I love the smell of baby powder. Love it, love it, love it! I wouldn't wear it on myself, but I do love the scent. Maybe that's why I wanted to have a baby so badly. Kidding.

12:34 PM  
Anonymous jen said...

10 things about project runway

1) i was all set to hate malan. i thought he was going to be like stephen from top chef. all supercilious and know it all. but he turned out to be quite vulnerable. and he CRIED. and it made me get a bit teary myself.

2) angela is a bitch. i don't like her. she needs to go.

3) i was so glad to see vera wang. michael kors is a bitch. and he gets on my nerves.

4) i love tim gunn. do you listen to his podcasts on itunes? he can get a little catty. and his use of vocab words from 7th grade cracks me up.

5) heidi klum's voice could cut glass

6) i like laura- the redhead.

7)i DON'T like the voting they offer up halfway through the show.

8) i DON't, DO NOT like the guy with the tatoos on his neck. see, i don't even want to remember his name

9) are there ANY straight male fashion designers out there??!

10) i can't WAIT for next week's challenge (tim gunn says they are called challenges not episodes, i learned this from his podcast)

If you think that discussing this on our blogs will make us objects of ridicule and disdain you can email me at

9:54 PM  
Blogger Cory said...

B - She's so cute it would be hard to discipline her.

K - You're funny. It's kind of spongy, and I can only compare it to angel food cake, but not as good. I actually thought the yeast was dead again, but apparently not.

H - Check your yeast. It lives a much shorter life than I ever knew.

C - Stop copying Heather's comments. Jeez.

A - Did you know that Yankee Candle makes a baby powder scent? I always think of you when I see that.

B - For the love of God, start a blog.

J - Expect an email from me asap.

10:16 PM  
Anonymous jen said...

for the record (and i'm not ashamed to admit this) i use baby powder every day.

it keeps my thunder thighs from chafing. especially in this heat!!

11:11 PM  
Blogger C. said...

Cory, what can we do to peer pressure B (and while I'm at it, your MOM too!!! How great would that be??) into starting a blog? It worked with Kasey and Carolyn (well, until she met a man). This is bullshit.

Bridge, pllllease start a freaking blog. You have things like the "I don't know" story to post. Don't make me call you sperm. : )

12:20 AM  

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